
What Kind of Lawyer Are You?
When you walk into court, are you that cute unsuspecting lawyer who charms a jury? Or are you the pit bull who is constantly in attack mode? Comedian John Oliver did a hilarious video where he depicted the Supreme Court justices as dogs. And I have to admit, he pegged the justice’s personalities. Watch the […]
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Major Cases of this Supreme Court Term
Supreme Court Sweeps is nearly over, and what a great season this was at the United States Supreme Court! Sweeps week, for those of you that cable television is a distant memory, is the time when big things happen on TV shows to attract viewership and ad money. If something crazy is going to happen […]
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Supreme Court Hands NCAA 9-0 Defeat
While normally I am no fan of collegiate blowouts as they make for really boring entertainment, this collegiate blowout was fairly entertaining. Because in the biggest matchup of the year, the NCAA got walloped by a team of 9 octogenarians. Can we say skunked? That’s right. The Supreme Court handed the NCAA a 9-0 whooping, […]
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Standing Strikes Again! The Supreme Court Dodges Obamacare by Saying it is Unenforceable.
Today, in a surprising 7-2 decision, the Supreme Court, once again, dodged the question of whether Obamacare is unconstitutional. In an opinion written by Justice Breyer, the Court said the plaintiffs didn’t have standing to even challenge the Affordable Care Act (ACA) and so the case was dismissed. Overview of Obamacare Just like Nightmare on […]
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California v. Texas: The Carrot Strikes Back and Pandora’s Box
Overview of Obamacare Just like Nightmare on Elm Street parts 1 through 65, there have been several renditions of the Affordable Care Act (ACA) lawsuits at the Supreme Court. And depending on your political persuasion, just as scary. California v. Texas is just the latest in a long line of Obamacare cases before the Supreme […]
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Campaign Tips to Avoid Bad Dancing, Monkey Business, and Other Election Faux Pas
The political sphere has no shortage of entertainment, drama, and cringe-worthy moments. And the campaign season does not disappoint when it comes to delivering magnificent faux-pas we love to poke fun at. Today’s political candidates have made some mistakes, and because of that, you don’t have to. We at Comedian of Law have accumulated some […]
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Legal Tips You Didn’t Know Were Necessary
If you’re a lawyer, you’re no stranger to being sought out by friends and family for legal advice. It’s inevitable that everyone needs it at some point. It’s just one of those professions. Doctors, lawyers, auto-mechanics … everyone wants a free tip here and there. If you didn’t want anyone to be asking you for […]
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Filling the Seat: How ACB’s Confirmation Stacks Up with History
This week, Amy Coney Barrett has been in the spotlight as she undergoes her confirmation hearings for possible appointment to the Supreme Court. Much about this confirmation hearing has been novel from the Covid format to sports and Star Wars references (proof we need more women in government) to the speed at which this confirmation […]
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American Deja Vu: 2020 isn’t as “Unprecedented” as We Think
The word “unprecedented” gets thrown around these days like cheap candy in the family communal Halloween bucket. In these unprecedented times… These bitter political fights are unprecedented. The blatant bias of the media is unprecedented, Chick-fil-A’s drive-thru efficiency is unprecedented. Granted, it is unprecedented that Americans voted the star of a reality tv show as […]
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The Notorious RBG paved the way for the Newbie ACB
The Notorious RBG sets trends. Let’s start with what she wore around her neck. How many Justices, when given the chance to adorn their judicial robes, would pick a doily? Given the fact that only 3.5% of America’s Justices have been women—not many. But more on that later. Perhaps if confirmed, Amy Coney Barrett will […]
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The Twitter-in-Chief’s Executive Order on Social Media: The biggest nothing burger since the McDLT
Last week, our Twitter-in-Chief signed an executive order that promised to be the equivalent of raining down fire and brimstone on Twitter. At a minimum, it was supposed to be the equivalent of throwing down small Lego pieces on Twitter’s bedroom floor and turning off the lights. In other words, it was supposed to be […]
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President Trump Triumphs Again, Somehow
While Trump may have been denied on Twitter, he won the real battle in the Supreme Court. With his first two travel bans being received about as well as the news of his election among late night comedians, President Trump came back with a third version of his travel ban. And unlike the families at […]
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People of Walmart: Lawyer Edition
Most people have seen or at least heard of the “people of Walmart.” Notorious for ridiculous outfits, trashy behavior, and an irresistible compulsion for great deals, these people have become Facebook and Twitter famous and the laughing stock of many. Four New York lawyers decided that social media had a niche, very similar to the […]
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Driving and disputing while drunk. Great for comedy, bad for your career
How can you tell a lawyer is drunk? He doesn’t argue when you call him out. Which is exactly what Kansas attorney Justin Holstin did. Unfortunately for him, the Kansas Supreme Court had no lenience for the honest attorney. (Jumbo shrimp anyone? Military intelligence? McDonald’s food?) Holstin agreed to take a blood alcohol test at […]
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Bobby Knight wannabe lawyer gets disbarred
Screaming “liar” and kicking a table sounds like an issue that only parents of small children, and possibly presidential debate moderators, should have to deal with. These tantrums drive parents and siblings to the brink of insanity. Which for most of us, is not a very far drive! But what about when adults are the […]
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Lawyer sets up fake Match.com profile of opposing counsel
“If you play with matches (or in this case, Match.com), you get burned.” These wise words from Vincent Vega could have saved Drew Quitschau copious amounts of trouble. But unfortunately, the scammer had not seen Pulp Fiction and got burned when he set up a fake, and rather demeaning, profile of his opposing counsel on […]
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Just(ice) retire already, would you?
In the words of the Great Bambino, “Heroes get remembered, but legends never die.” True as this quote may be, the Sultan of Swat forgot the third line. The quote should read, “heroes get remembered and legends never die, but Supreme Court Justices will out-last the sun.” This issue has an interesting background. Original justices […]
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NBA: National leBron Association—or is it?
With star players like JaVale McGee and J.R. Smith, the Warriors managed to win game one of the NBA post-Finals. Everyone that watches the NBA knows that the real championship series was the Western Conference Finals. But due to taxes and tariffs imposed by the King in the East, the official championship game would pit LeBron James […]
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NFL declares 11th commandment: Thou shalt not make the NFL lose money
Just like last year, the NFL is fine with kneeling during the National Anthem. Except this year, they are utilizing a different kind of fine. No longer do they say fine while silently disapproving because they are too flustered to continue arguing (a situation every man has found himself in. Word of advice: it’s not […]
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Masterpiece wedding cake? Hardly.
The official opinion is in, ladies and gentlemen. By order of the Supreme Court of the United States, traditional wedding cakes are worthless. They ruled 9-0 that cheesecakes are now the official cakes of weddings. Anyone wanting to serve stale white cake instead has to sign a disclaimer with the city clerk recognizing that their […]
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Federal Court gives President Trump a good ole’ Mutombo
And another one of Trump’s bans has been overturned. But this ban was a little different. Rather than keeping foreigners out of the country, President Trump is blocking people from viewing his Twitter page. President Trump has become a Twitter sensation since joining in 2009 and has acquired over 52 million followers. Anyone could see […]
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Supreme Court Justice calls the law an “a$$” in Supreme Court Opinion
Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito, aka, Bob Saget’s doppelgänger, made a rather unusual assessment of the law in his dissenting opinion in Collins v. Virginia. The case dealt with whether, without a warrant, the cops could search under a tarp that covered a stolen motor cycle parked in a driveway. Tip for all of you […]
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94-year-old judge getting jiggy with inmate’s love song
Judges on American Idol and The Voice are used to critiquing music, but an actual judge was put on the spot recently to assess an inmate’s musical performance. Leo Glassner, a federal judge in Brooklyn, received a rather unusual request from an inmate to check out his new release, “African Girl.” John Star, whom Glasser […]
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Parents evict 30-year-old son from basement after refusing to do chores and get a job
With graduation season coming to an end, students are finally gaining the freedom they desire: High school graduates moving off to college, college students searching for gainful employment, graduate students moving back into their parents’ basements. But Michael Rotondo’s recent legal woes offers this caution to these carefree graduates: Be careful! Your freeloading days might […]
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Lawsuits R Us can solve your holiday budget crisis!
Black Friday When Black Friday was originally established in 1952 it commemorated a dark turn for American holiday traditions. The Friday following Thanksgiving was given this ominous name to commemorate the first day of the Christmas shopping season. It was the day when retailers balance sheets changed from red to black. That sounds like a good […]
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Warning! Fire is hot and water is wet!
Calling Captain Obvious It seems that nothing is quite as obvious as the legal disclaimer. It’s as if Captain Obvious was bored, and so took a job at a local law firm writing disclaimers! Go to the store and look at the warnings for scooters. This might shock you, but the directions state, “This product […]
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Notorious RBG issues a smack down, Partying at Peaches’ and Trump’s Travel Ban
It was a fascinating week at the high court, as Notorious RBG, aka Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, dealt a judicial smack down on Justice Gorsuch, the justices reminisced about their partying days, and the Trump Travel Ban got the boot. Dirty Politicians meet Notorious RBG In Gill v Whitford, the Court took up the issue […]
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Supreme Court: Cell phone data, travel bans and stale cake
Check out our YouTube channel, The Law Show, to watch the Comedian of Law, Joel Oster, and soccer mom/blog writer, Ari Gross, crack up about these cases! Leaves are changing color. Footballs are being deflated. What does this mean? Yes, Pumpkin Spice lattes and the Supreme Court are back in session! On October 2, the nine Justices will don […]
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Leave it to BuzzFeed to make a defamation lawsuit look cute!
A defamation lawsuit was recently filed against the wildly popular website BuzzFeed. Big shocker, it’s politically related. It’s not the topic that caught our eye, though. When BuzzFeed filed a motion to move jurisdiction from Florida to New York, the plaintiffs pulled out all the stops with their rebuttal brief title. I think we can all […]
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Phoenix Ex-Con Attempts “Citizen’s Arrest” In Court
If you thought you had seen it all when Florida defense attorney Stephen Gutierrez set his own pants on fire in court, just you wait! Last September ex-con Brittian Young attempted to perform a citizens’ arrest…on a judge…in an active courtroom. Young was armed with a fake warrant and a bag of 2-foot long zip […]
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Murr-dering a Wisconsin family’s property rights
In 1995, the parents of the four Murr siblings passed ownership of two waterfront lots to their children. Four siblings … two lots. Yea, this is a recipe for family harmony! In 2004, when the siblings attempted to sell the second lot, chaos ensued. I’m sure at this point you’re expecting a juicy story about […]
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Dude, your pants are literally on fire.
No need for “liar, liar” metaphors here! During closing arguments on March 8th, Miami defense attorney Stephen Gutierrez fled the courtroom as smoke began billowing from his pocket. Want to take a crack at what his client was on trial for? You guessed it, arson. Gutierrez was defending Claudy Charles, who had been accused of […]
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The U.S. Trademark Office is fighting racism…by discriminating based on race!
In 2006, Oregon native and musician Simon Tam started a dance rock band called “The Slants.” After the popularity of the band grew, a lawyer advised Tam to trademark the name. No problem, right? Wrong! The U.S. Patents and Trademarks Office denied the application. The reason? They found that the name would likely be disparaging […]
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“But we didn’t know you couldn’t lie to the Court!”
Orange County social workers lied and submitted falsified documents to the court to justify taking two young daughters from their mother. When they got caught, can you guess what their defense was? “But we didn’t know you couldn’t lie to the court!” That line didn’t work on your mother, and it won’t work in court. In […]
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Comedian of Law’s Top Ten Wacky Cases – #7 – Pelman v. McDonald’s
“I blame Obama!” seems to be the slogan for most Americans, seeking to cast blame for personal agitations, but child obesity isn’t one that sticks. Thanks Michelle! So when the Pelman family decided to seek happiness at the bottom of a Big Mac box and it resulted in waistband inflation, they went after the clown; […]
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Comedian of Law’s Top Ten Wacky Cases – #8 – Chambers v. God
Wouldn’t it be great if we could seek restitution for damages suffered at the hands of floods, hurricanes and tornadoes? I’m sure the Wicked Witch of the West would sign that petition in a heartbeat! Nebraska Senator Ernie Chambers tried to do just that by filing a permanent injunction against the Almighty. That’s right, he […]
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Comedian of Law’s Top Ten Wacky Cases, #9 – Dougherty v. The Home Depot
#9 – Dougherty v. The Home Depot Warning: If you are leery of public restrooms, approach this case with extreme caution! Bob Dougherty of Denver, CO, will not able to look at a toilet seat without cringing, ever again. Mr. Dougherty was doing some harmless home improvement shopping at his local The Home Depot, when […]
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